Thursday, October 21, 2010
This past Tuesday, our good friend LeBron James decided to hold the most self-serving ode to pseudo-martyrdom since ESPN's shameless show Bonds on Bonds. Using his Twitter account, James decided to publish tweets that ranged from some sound advice, "why don't u speak by moving ur head under a moving car," to the utterly deplorable and racist " ur a big nosed big lipped bug eyed (racial slur). Ur greedy u try to hide ur ghettoness."
Look, anybody with an IQ that's not in single digits, and that has an ounce of decency, seriously condemns this type of garbage, but for LeBron to publish this trash is even more appalling. In a pathetic attempt at garnering public sympathy for himself, James' little charade ended up severely backfiring on him, and outing him as a desperate and clueless schmuck. No one was buying the manufactured bullshit that he sold, and any rational sports fan refused to believe that the level of mostly innocuous badgering that came his way wasn't warranted by his repugnant behavior. Well, everyone besides the good folks in Bristol Connecticut.
Brian Windhorst, friend of the blog and good guy, betrayed his Steamer roots with his latest article that's up on ESPN.com's main page. Under the title "King of Pain" and a picture that makes him look like a wounded soul, Windy's article frames LeBron as an emotionally distressed sufferer, whose only solace is found in watching a wall televisions in one room, and reading two blackberries at once. Windy neglected to mention the gluttony and offensive nature of having A WALL OF TELEVISIONS IN ONE FUCKING ROOM. Another piece of prime puff in Brian's expose was it's overall thesis that LeBron was motivated in ways he has never been before. Look out now. If he shows the type of fire and drive that he did in the Boston series, I'm sure he'll be hoisting the Larry O' Brien in June.
We here at the Steamer wanted to contributed our own brand of hate tweets, which is far superior to the dated hate speech, to Mr. James, and here are some that I hope he reads from one of his two blackberries.
Man, what a creep that Brett Favre is! Hey speaking of texting your junk, did you get those pictures I sent you??? @Chris Broussard
Just though you should know that it's been five days since I've eaten anything and I could really use some liquids. Also, I think Maverick Carter is rubbing it in by pouring Grey Goose on the floor. @espn.com writer who has been taken hostage by LRMR
Mr. James, I just returned from the dry cleaners with your gear and am now ironing all of your "Witness" t-shirts. Thank you for this great honor and get ready for your bunyon rub!! @Chris Bosh
I think it's time to put the past behind us once and for all. How about you meet me at the corner of Imperial and Buckeye tomorrow at 3 AM? Oh, come alone and don't make a sound...Dan G @ Dan Gilbert
FOUL!! FOR GOD'S SAKE FOUL THE CELTICS!!! @ Mike Brown
Daddy, when are you coming home? Also, your new LeBron VIII's are shit. @ Bryce Maximus James
Hey, sorry about little Bryce calling your shoes "shit." As his grandfather, I take full responsibility and vow that it won't happen again. @ Delonte West
Lebron we have also taken our talents to South Beach. Remember to GTL. @jerseyshoreDbags
Lebron, The Decision was such great television. Gripping drama, I was on the edge of my seat. @thebachelor#1fan
Lebron, I can’t imagine what a burden the Decision must have been for you. It must have been so difficult to decide what team you were going to allow to pay you $120mil @unemployclevelandsteelworkers
Lebron, great work signing with the Heat. Now those two children of yours will finally have dinner on the table every night @latrellsprewell
Lebron, I once made a Decision. It was not quite as tough as yours though. @SophieZawistowski
Lebron, you always keep it real. You take care off all your boys, hook them up with jobs, let them handle your PR work. Keep up the loyalty. I am a big fan. @bankruptcyattorneys
Posted by The Crew at 10:53 AM